Kayla Reed Found Dead

"For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander." (Matthew 15:19)

A body found January 10th in a San Joaquin County irrigation canal was identified as Kayla Reed, the 15-year-old Livermore girl who had been missing since early December. She was last seen at home by her mother about 12:30 a.m. on December 3rd. Kayla was mad when mom told her not to leave the house so late. Two days later, mom reported her as a runaway.

Just a few days ago, TV reporters were interviewing teenagers at her high school. Her friends said they were NOT surprised that Kayla ran away because they knew she had a troubled home life. (Her single mom often had arguments with her; her dad had only seen her eight or ten times in her entire life.) However, they became worried after she was missing for so long.

Police is investigating Kayla's death as a homicide. Her body had no obvious sign of struggle so she might know her killer. Police are checking all possible connections including Kayla's home page on the website myspace.com which is very popular among teenagers. Did she meet someone online? Was there a stalker who found her by profiling her information off the website?

Parents, are you in touch with your kids' feelings? Do they know and feel your love? Are you aware of issues with Internet Safety? Do you give them proper guidance?

Copyright © 2006 Winnis Chiang, Parenting ABC

Astronaut Jose Hernandez

"I can do everything through him who gives me strength." (Philippians 4:13)

I like "against all odds" type of stories. Tonight I watched the interview of Astronaut Jose Hernandez on TV. The NASA engineer remembers exactly where he was when he heard the first Hispanic-American had been chosen to travel into space.

"I was hoeing a row of sugar beets in a field near Stockton, Calif., and I heard on my transistor radio that Franklin Chang-Diaz had been selected for the Astronaut Corps," says Hernandez, 41, who was a senior in high school at the time. Already interested in science and engineering then, he recalled, "That was the moment I said, 'I want to fly in space.' And that's something I've been striving for each day since then."

Hernandez was one of four children in a migrant farming family from Mexico. He didn't learn English until he was 12 years old, and spent much of his childhood traveling with his family from Mexico to southern California each March, then working northward to the Stockton area by November, picking strawberries and cucumbers at farms along the route. Then they would return to Mexico for Christmas, and start the cycle all over again come spring. He thanked his parents (who only had 3rd grade education) for settling down in Stockton so that he could attend school and follow his dream.

Parents, do you know your child's aspiration?

Copyright © 2006 Winnis Chiang, Parenting ABC

Brokeback Mountain Winning Four Globes

"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8)

Last night, Ang Lee won the Golden Globes best director award for his work on "Brokeback Mountain." The film is a story about two cowboys who concealed an ongoing homosexual affair from their families. The film also won Golden Globes for best drama, screenplay and original song. The triumph has positioned the movie as a solid front-runner for the Academy Awards, the Oscars!

As parents from oversea, do you admire Ang Lee who has found success as a Hollywood director? Most of us heard of him and/or watched his Wu Xia film "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." We do want our children to be successful in the United States. Don't we? But how about the homosexual message? Do we want our sons and daughters to endorse the value system of the film? It has frank depiction of a homosexual relationship and its physical and emotionally romantic aspects. I heard there were directors and actors who turned down involvement with the film because of its message.

In Taiwan, Ang Lee said, "I think we all have a Brokeback Mountain in our hearts. It's like an Eden - it's about romantic love and the illusion of love. The film won recognition in the United States and that gave me more faith (in film-making). I am doing my best and let fate decide on the Oscars." Apparently, he believed that, "the fact that the movie has found eager audiences across the country, including the conservative heartland, shows that Americans are willing to embrace stories of love in all forms."

Parents, what are you teaching your kids and teenagers about love?

Copyright © 2006 Winnis Chiang, Parenting ABC

Facing Charges of Child Endangerment

In his book, Dr. James Dobson wrote, "You will not always be saddled with the responsibility you now hold. Your children will be with you for but a few brief years, and the obligations you now shoulder will be nothing more than dim memories. Enjoy every moment of these days--even the difficult times--and indulge yourself in the satisfaction of having done an essential job right!"

A San Ramon married couple (age 39 and 32) were arrested for leaving two young children at home when they went to Las Vegas to celebrate the new year. They claimed they couldn't find anyone to look after the boys although they did find a dog sitter for their new puppies.

Most of us feel sorry for the kids, especially the 9-year-old who had to take care of himself and his 5-year-old autistic brother. Other sad and alarming details unfolded. The boys' mother died of cancer in 2003. It was the maternal grandmother who called the police. She aired her frustration on camera, "These kids are helpless. (They), like any other kids, or any other human beings, deserve the love, time and affection of a parent."

The couple is facing charges of felony child endangerment which carries a maximum sentence of six years in prison. They might be newlyweds and a working couple who deserved a vacation, but how about their parenting responsibilities? The older boy highlighted the sad situation with these words: "I thought they loved them (the puppies) more than us."

Copyright © 2006 Winnis Chiang, Parenting ABC

30th Wedding Anniversary

"May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth." (Proverbs 5:18)

Last night, one Chinese American couple celebrated their 30th wedding anniversary with a Chinese dinner banquet for over 60 people. What is so special about this celebration is that they chose to celebrate with family members and "old" friends, college classmates, and co-workers from earlier careers on the West Coast even though they have been living in the East Coast for almost three decades.

The husband orchestrated the event. They shared their love and joy with people who were there in their humble beginnings (when he was a Ph.D. candidate as a foreign student and she just started working). They introduced their family and friends as they recounted different periods in their marriage. They proudly showed off their two mature and responsible young adult children.

The climax was when he presented her with a surprised diamond ring. To his surprise, she also bought a diamond ring for him. As it turned out, before Christmas, each of them took one child to shop for the other parent. Since it was a secret, the husband and wife did not know about each other's plan. However, their children had it figured out ahead of time. They were so happy to be involved in the "diamond rings" conspiracy of their parents.

The love between a husband and his wife means a lot to their children. I always admire couples who are still in love as they mature in age. My father- and mother-in-law was such a couple. They were holding hands in their fifties when I first met them. The vision of "having a husband who would still love me and hold my hands in my old age just like them" was one of the main reasons I dared to get marry after only three months of dating. Now after 30 years and five months, I am still witnessing the positive impact of such love on their children and grandchildren.

Copyright © 2006 Winnis Chiang, Parenting ABC